Confessions

I've been debating about posting about this for the past several weeks, but finally just need to get it off my chest:

A few weeks ago, I was considering giving up on my business.

Seriously.

I was feeling so rotten about it.  Lack of sales, retailers returning stock to me, and dwindling funds made me question the legitimacy of my business.  Not only my business, but my path in life.  If I'm not making enough to help support my family, is this really my calling?

But it's not as if I went into this line of work for the money.  And thankfully, my mister has a full-time job that allows me to keep doing what I'm doing, so most of the money I make goes back into the business or else covers things for Whitney and occasionally goes towards some household bills.

Let's face it, though.  My full-time gig right now really is being a mom.  Take today, for example.  We booked a nanny to look after Whitney, since Matt is busy working on a film and I had hopes of getting in more than 3 hours of work.  But due to unforeseen circumstances (a car accident - no major injuries, I think), the nanny couldn't make it and my plans went out the window.  I could have made a stink about this.  Instead, I see it as a sign that today was simply meant to be spent with Whitney.

These years with her are so precious - though they don't always seem so - and I need to remember that I won't be able to get them back.  She won't always want to spend this much time with me.  

So, what it basically comes down to is that I have to remember not to be so hard on myself.  I am a full-time mom, running a part-time business.  No matter how much money I make, I don't want to lose the love for what I do.  And I am NOT giving up.  It just may take me a bit longer to get to where I want to be.

On the bright side, I finally designed some baby congratulations cards, currently available in my etsy shop and also at Kid Culture.

And I am looking to expand my list of retailers this year, particularly in Canada, so if anyone has suggestions for cool shops to approach, please do share.  Thanks for listening.